I think we can all relate to each other on how hard this journey is, for all of us, whether we have 5 kilos to lose or 50 or whatever your number is, you have to change your whole attitude and your whole life to make this work.I don’t suffer fools very easily and I have a hard time dealing with people who are complaining about not losing weight, but who also aren’t prepared to change their lifestyle to enable any weight loss to occur.
How do you handle these kind of people?
I’m sure I probably was one of these people a few times in my dieting life (and maybe some people will say I still am). Looking for a quick fix and a short term patch up. Yoyo dieting is the worst form of dieting that you can compete in and it does more harm than good to your body.
I remember trying all the diets known to humankind. I won’t bother listing them all. Needless to say most of what I “lost” was money. You’ve all heard the joke I’m sure:
“I went to Jenny Craig and in the first week I lost $400!!”
Sure it works, in the short term, but it’s not sustainable for life.
It annoys me that people aren’t as pumped up by getting healthy as I am, it annoys me that some people can’t see that they’re ruining their lives by eating crap and filling their bodies with high fat, high salt and high sugar foods, it further annoys me that they try to sabotage my good work and say things like “why do you need to bother with that anymore, you’ve lost some weight now, come on”. They don’t realise that this is a change forever, not just for the time you’re losing weight and then you go back to eating what you ate before.
Now I realise what it is ……. I’m a reformed dieter …………. Am I the worst kind??? Yes, I think I am.
The thing I love about Weight Watchers is that you can adapt it to suit your lifestyle. You can have a glass of wine, or two, you can have some chocolate and you can certainly personalise the programme to fit in with your lifestyle.
BUT now what I’m worrying about is that I’m trying to convert OTHER people. Perhaps I’ve become a bit of a pain in the arse to my friends. If we have people over for a BBQ – there is no longer the cream and cheese laden potato bake (which I’m famous for), the butter smothered bread rolls, the salads complete with bacon strips, parmesan cheese and fat laden dressing, to say nothing of the huge cheese platter, the calorie packed dips and biscuits or the enormous cream cakes and gateux.
Now there is lean fillet steak, salad with ten different vegetables and low fat dressing, bread rolls without the butter and no potato bake in sight. We very rarely have “snacks” and if we do I’ts light hommus and vegetable sticks or rice crackers, a lot of fruit and no dessert anywhere to be seen.
I feel like taking these people and shaking them and saying “start today, don’t put it off til next weekend or after your birthday or after Christmas or New Year, start NOW, you’re killing yourself”
… but of course I don’t, I keep my mouth shut (mostly – well as much as I can!!) which is really hard for me.
Someone told my husband at the wedding last Friday that if he doesn’t do something about his weight, he’ll be dead in ten years. How scarey is that? The guy who said this was a complete jerk and completely up himself (he wore a shiney suit for god’s sake!!) but DH was just scoffing saying “what would he know”. My DH is very overweight, in fact if you did his BMI he would be well into the obese category. He does care about it and he is trying to do something about it, but its all happening very slowly and he’s looking for a quick fix.
It’s all very well when it’s someone you don’t know much and telling them exactly what they should be doing to fix their diet – if they ask – but when it’s your DH and you have to live with him every day of the week …. Well, you know……
When I started typing this post I wanted to talk about people who you see after not seeing them for ages, who inadvertently FORGET to mention how great you’re looking. It seems I’ve taken a different turn – I’m rambling – perhaps that’s enough for now.
Bri
5 comments:
Yes, I like these posts too! Go Reflective Bri!
I know what you mean about DH. Actually, more to the point, my MUM knows what you mean. My mum has always been the healthy kind - she has always had to work hard to stay in shape, but she's been very determined and committed and looks great at 48. When I started putting on weight (and even before, but that's another story!) she expressed her concern in the nicest way she could, but I wasn't ready to change. This happened for years. Actually, when I fell pregnant with Charlie, her main concern was that my health would spriral out of control and I'd never come back. But even though I knew all of her concerns were valid, I wasn't ready to change.
Losing weight is one of those personal things. Think about what made you want to change - was it someone else's desires or your own? I bet it was you own, or there's no way you'd have been able to stick to it for this long.
I wish I could wave a magic wand and make all the unhealthy people in my life start to turn it around, but the truth is that all I can do is try to be a good example and offer them delicious low fat food to tempt them into my way of thinking! I know that it's heartbreaking sometimes (especially when it's your DH) but they won't change unless they are ready.
Big hugs to you. I really know what you mean. I wish Tom would eat healthier too, but luckily he will usually just eat what I eat. Which is why he's been putting on weight recently because we've been having too much pizza and Hungry Jack's. Oops.
Sorry for the long comment! Hang in there, kid.
BRI BRI BRI...just where has the old Bri gone, flown out the window with those 18kg... Loving the new Bri. You have a great way of articulating what we think and know, (even though we forget it sometimes) You know these are life choices and you are making them for your own benefit. You will live longer, and be able to enjoy your life and do things with your son as he grows up. He will be very proud of you and will love being able to do things with you.
I have to agree with the others !
There are times when I feel like a converted smoker wanting everyone else to give up. Like Kellee I would love to wave a magic wand and make all the unhealthy people I know and love better, but I don't and so I can't and they have to do it for themselves.
I got into heaps of trouble once for making a comment about an anonymous person on my blog who hadn't commented on the weigh that I had lost and it really annoys me because it isn't as though it isn't noticable - I find it very annoying !!!!
My DH is also over weight - he has a cholestrol problem and he has knee problems - all of which would be solved to a certain extent if he lost some weight but I can't force him. I have said before that if my health was at risk, I would do whatever I had to to ensure I lived as long as I could - but that is me and not him and I just have to try to have healthy things in the house for him to eat and minimise the cr*ppy food that he sometimes likes to buy. Above that, I can only continue to love him and do the best that I can when I prepare the food to give healthy meals. He just hasn't reached the point where enough is enough - the point that I reached nearly 23 kilos ago !!
Sorry for the long ramble but wanted to let you know that you aren't alone in the issues that you raised - this forum has been the best thing for me to learn and realise that I am not the only one dealing with these sorts of problems and it has made me feel more 'normal' !!!
Take care and have a great week !
Me
I too am a reformed dieter. I too dish out advice or bite off my tongue trying (and how many points would that be??) I think we should start a club. You can be leader. LOL
Great post Bri. Hope your lovely DH joins you on your crusade soon :)
Your posts are great!!
It's a shame some people just don't wanna change!!
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